My solutions to the Adelaide Crows’ maddening malaise

My solutions to the Adelaide Crows’ maddening malaise

The Adelaide Crows are a proud football club who for the duration of their tenure in the AFL have set an extremely high standard in their conduct and their expectations.

They famously sacked Brenton Sanderson after he failed to return to finals two seasons after they went within a kick of going to the finals. The Crows have put forward their most meek performances in club history to leave them staring at the first winless season in nearly 60 years (Fitzroy Lions did so in 1964).

This ignominious trophy is a testament to how far the Crows have fallen from their 2017 highs. But the Crows have the opportunity to set themselves up extremely well for the future in this year’s trade period and draft. If the Crows wish to fix themselves, here’s what they should do:

Step 1: Turn pick ten into two first-round picks The Geelong Cats are extremely flush with draft capital thanks to a fortuitous trade they made with the West Coast Eagles for Tim Kelly. In order to build a stronger draft hand, they should offer pick ten and one of their second-round picks to the Geelong football club in return for both of their first-round picks.

This would leave them with a free run at the best young talent from around the country, and could even be used to build strength for next years draft should they decide they wish to have more picks in a draft that isn’t so compromised.

Step 2: Trade out the ageing warriors Unfortunately a lot of the talent the Crows have brought in over the last few years hasn’t worked out for them. As such they should aim to move on from the talent that lacks the intangible leadership capabilities that Adelaide so desire.

I’m of course referring to players like Taylor Walker, Bryce Gibbs, Kyle Hartigan and David McKay. As to what sort of clubs would take these players, I’m not sure, they’re all great at their best but their best is a long way behind them.

However, I believe Brisbane could be a good fit for Tex Walker; they have a need for key forwards and at his best he could easily kick 40-50 goals. As for most of their ageing talent, they’ll only get pennies on the dollar.

The two players that are untouchable in my honest assessment are Rory Sloane and Riley O’Brien. Unless a trade comes through that is a godfather offer they should not be on the table.

Step 3: Unload the brothers Crouch Brad and Matt Crouch have tried their hearts out for the Adelaide footy club, but they do not give the midfield a unique look. They’re slow and they gather large possession tallies despite not doing anything with those possessions. Clubs such as Essendon and Carlton would jump at the opportunity to have such accomplished players on their list but the question is would they pay enough for Adelaide to let them go?

Brad Crouch

Step 4: Review every board position and trim the fat The notorious camp established by the Adelaide Crows has been identified as the root cause of their problems with players being subject to psychological torture and sleep deprivation as a way to improve their drive to win. Anything that violates the Geneva convention is not meant for our great game, and the club should apologise unconditionally as well as remove pertinent parts of the board that are guilty of being a party to these actions.

Secondly, I also believe the Crows should remove Mark Ricciuto as director of football, he blows a lot of smoke and as a result damages the morale of the footy club.

So that’s my opinion on what the Crows should do to fix their position. I believe that would serve them in good stead for the future, let me know what you think in the comments.